BREAKING NEWS
Top-top-top Secret photo of crash and backwards ship obtained by ZNN’s embedded spy onboard
-Navy brass lays blames on Seaman Apprentice Jones who flipped the blueprints during construction 22 years ago. He will be brought back on active duty, keel-hauled
-Ship’s command was too busy teaching “how to be a better woke sailor” to notice the ship was backwards
-Fresh Ensign Bob Jones complained to the CO about the ship steering wrong “as if it’s built backwards” but was relieved of duties for his ‘poor attitude.’
-In spite of losing a $50M dollar aircraft and never noticing his ship was backwards, the commanding officer CAPT Scott Adams Apple will be awarded a Medal of Honor of achieving a 100% woke trained crew
