The Society of Human Resource Management.org, the governing (“do as we say, not as we do”) body of the Human Resources Industry, proudly announces new certifications that will better prepare future HR professional to tackle panicdemic issues in the workplace.
SHRM-CP (Society of Human Resource Management- Crazy Person)
SHRM-SCP (Society of Human Resource Management- Super Crazy Person)
SHRM.org now will be offering the following easy, multiple choice, online (with cheating allowed) certifications for only $2,450 for the RN and $6,678 for the MD.
SHRM-RN (Society of Human Resource Management-Registered Nurse)
SHRM-MD (Society of Human Resource Management-Medical Doctor)
ELEVATING HR AND IMPACTING .115 MILLION EMPLOYEES WORLDWIDE
.300K+
HR and business leaders, impacting to death .115 million+ employees worldwide.
.100K+
SHRM certified professionals who are transforming the workplace into a worker’s paradise
.10K+
Advocacy Team (A-Team) members bribing all 435 Congressional districts.
.280+
Non-Academic, paper certification and non-professional development scholarships and grants to be awarded this year.
With these new certifications, ‘Full Stack” HR professionals will not only be able to offer crappy hiring practices, poor financial advice, ill-advised legal council, and continuing clucking Hen overlording, but now, they’ll be able to offer up proven and valid medical advice to CEOs, so that they’ll be able to screen out and fire, on the spot, any returning employees after the virus crisis is over.
“Did you just sneeze? You’re fired.” “You look hot, your fired!” etc., with full compliance and regulatory assurances, SHRM is here to make sure the CEO doesn’t get sued and ‘we’ lose our cushy do-nothing jobs.
“The Future of Work is Now,” says SHRM.org Supreme Chairman and CEO Mr. Erdogan.
ABOUT SHRM
SHRM, the Society for Human Resource Mis-Management, creates bitter workplaces where employers and employees snitch on each other, together. As the crazy voice of all things work, worker class proles, and the workplace, SHRM is the foremost expert on nothing, we are the master ill-convener and lame thought leader on all business issues impacting today’s 1950’s Stalin workplaces-we can even build data-centers better than the IT peeps. With 300,000+ HR and business executive members in 165 countries, SHRM negatively impacts the lives of more than 115 million workers and families globally. Join us today.